4.12.2013

Hip Redneckery

I straddle the line between redneck and hipster every day.

Honestly, that line is tons closer than you think, actually. It's more of a smudge really.

I mean seriously, if you put overalls on The Lumineers they would totally be the band on the front porch of Noah Calhoun's porch in The Notebook. Think about it.

They all love antlers, and acoustic guitars, not to mention the occasional banjo.

So hidden under this not so deep hipster- wannabe facade is a total redneck who adores bluegrass music and can eat a pound of hot flavored pork rinds in one sitting. I just can't deny my Kentucky roots. It's in my blood. This southern Ohio girl, may get all emo Death Cab for Cutie with the best of them, but when "high lonesome sound" comes on I testify. I don't sing well, but I sing loud, and that should totally count for something.

So yesterday, we had a redneckified day, first with a trip to Bass Pro shop, to look at the fish, because who else in the world has a huge aquarium of fish that you can see for free I'm talking to you Newport Aquarium...20 bucks for a THREE year old REALLY?! Not to mention the best Duck Dynasty memorabilia and the finest selection of dried questionable meats you'll ever find. Elk Meat? Delicious. It's redneck heaven on earth. Seriously, you cannot walk into the place without playing the if I won the lottery,what crazy crap could I blow it all on game.

Of course, my kids look a little out of place with the whole Fedora/boy leggings combo, but hey, they rocked it. I'm sorry that their camo swishy pants were in the wash. Sue me.



Then we proceeded to out redneck even ourselves and go to Cracker Barrel for lunch. Seriously, Cracker Barrel is my happy place. I could go there to eat all of my feelings good or bad, despite the fact that our insurance doesn't cover the whole chicken and dumplings heart attack scenario. Plus the awesome country store is perfect free entertainment for my boys who aren't yet into the whole whiny I want this,  can I have this, phase yet. Okay, full disclosure I told them that Cracker (as in Mr. Cracker Barrel) was a man and that he was just letting us "borrow" stuff, and that it wasn't for sale. You call it a lie, I call it a good 30 minutes of fantastic accordion practice for mommy. Go ahead, judge away. Regardless we all got pretty great uninterrupted play time with instruments, totally worth it.

I mean, is there anything better than a little guy in a Fedora working the fiddle with his little brother busting out Weird Al riffs on the accordion?


Highly Doubtful.

Our grand finale was the meal, which was deliciously filled with undertones of regret and type 2 diabeetus. Wilford Bromley would be proud. 

All in all it was an amazing day. Call it what you want, hipster, redneck...I called it fun. 

Speaking of fun, I totally bobbled my head all over Last Call With Brittany last night as a panelist! Fingers crossed you'll see me on your Google screen again! Thanks Brittany!

If  you missed it Click Here...be warned it's mommies after dark, so take your best bikini wax experience and multiply that by 100. So it was a hiariously inappropriate half hour of good old fashioned fun. Check it out!









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